My Story with Allah

assalamu 3alikom,

My story with Allah, this is smth bgd...

i do LOVE allah, i always think that i really want to satisfy him in every action i do. smtimes i do things that i REALLY dont want to do only cz i know that Allah will be pleased or bcz Allah commanded us to do it.

sometimes i DONT do things that i REALLY want to do, cz i know that Allah wont be satisfied.
i sometimes imagine my self standing in front of Allah, in the day of judgment, and he asks me why did i do smthing masalan, oh my GOD!!! wat am i supposed to say now! , i should have a reason, or i shouldnt do it aslaan...that's y i care to do wat makes Allah pleased...i really want to stand proudly in front of him

& because i Love him, i want him to Love me too, i cant imagine my self yoom 2l eayama "the day of judgment" and Allah is angry at me or not satisfied, or that the prophet Muhammad (pbuh) feeling ashamed that i belong to his omma, or even called "muslim"...i really want my judgment to be the happiest thing that ever happened to me.

Now my problem is, that in some situations i really dont know wat will satisfies Allah, ya rabby a elly yerdeek wana a3melo, i really dont kno....in these situations i start feeling sad, cz my biggest wish that i know that it wont happen in this life becomes urgent, i feel that i just want it to come true ASAP, my wish is that i talk to Allah & he answers mee baaaaaaaack!!!!

i kno that this wont happen fel donia, only fel ganna, that's is one of the reasons y i really want to be fel ganna...i also wish sooooo much to stay with prophet Muhammad (PBUH) an talk to him & tell him soo much things & learn from him & listen to him salla Allahu 3alihi wasallaaam.

ya rabb erda 3anny w da55alny el ganna, this is my goal.

P.S.: when i wrote the title "my story with Allah", i had a very different content in mind, but i donno y i went to another point & couldnt stop my self of writing...so, isAllah i'll post "My story with Allah" soon.

thnx for ur time!

salaaaaaaam